Monthly Archives: December 2013

The Barbie Belief System.

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It’s easy to be a Barbie girl in a Barbie world, if you’re not in a Barbie world though – which many of us mere humans are certainly not (Jen Hawkins my friend, you are an exception) – its pretty damn hard to be a Barbie girl.

My guess is that the same law of physics applies to the whole “happiness” thing. It’s easy to be happy if you live in a happy world complete with loving parents, cool siblings, a lot of shifts at a job you love, a cool car, an awesome place to live, crazy fun friends and a constant tan. I’m basically referring to the the Pounder Meal with chicken sauce on the side to dip your chippies in; the whole enchilada; or as my beloved year 12 Maths teacher would say, ‘the whole sha-bang’.

What I mean, is that, it’s easy to be happy when everything is going super well, our beliefs that “everything happens for a reason”, that “every failure is a lesson is disguise”, that “(insert whatever inspiring quote turns you on)” seem so solid.

For sure, why wouldn’t we believe that we were MEANT to land that internship, MEANT to make that new friend, MEANT to get a day off on the hottest weekday? Seems logical to me!

But how about when we crash a car, have a fight with a younger sister (who constantly wears your clothes without asking…I wouldn’t name names), fail that subject, or lose the job you love. Surely all that was 100%, NOT MEANT to happen. Surely.

How much would you want to throw eggs on the head of anyone who attempted to tell you that “crashing your car is certainly for the best”. Like, I think I would actually cut you.

No way am I “happy”, and I DO NOT believe that this was for the purpose of some profound “life lesson”.

There is no way.

José.

(This was getting too serious, so thought I’d invite my Mexican friend to join the post :D).

But seriously. When a winning streak collapses, what do you believe then? Do you still believe that you live a wonderful life? That Santa is still real and that the monsters won’t find you if you hide under the covers for long enough?.

(On this note, can I just say, WHAT is Rihanna’s deal with being friends with the monster that’s under her bed? She is one crazy gal!)

It’s hard. But in the midst of the most challenging, heart-breaking, spine-chilling and uncertain times, I think the only thing we can believe, is that life will go on.

Tomorrow the sun will rise, 9am will become 10am, we will get hungry, get thirsty, hear a song, see the stars, hug, talk, and soon enough, smile, laugh and believe in all those beautiful things again.

As we grow and see this cycle re-emerge with the same certainty as the seasons that pass, a new belief is borne, one which takes precedence over all others. And it is this: that something good will actually, eventually, one day emerge.

Not before bedtime, or before the weekend. Maybe not even before your 21st, Christmas, or before you graduate. But one day.

One day you will look back and smile at what you thought was the end of your world. Smile at your naïveté in allowing you to lose that ‘spark’, along with the happiness you vowed to always believe in.

We soon can appreciate that yep, they were right, it was for your own good. It was just, life.

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I would love to know which beliefs keep you sane in the midst of difficult times, please feel free to contact me and and share your recipe for lemonade when life gives you lemons!

Shredding for life, not Stereo.

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I’ve always wondered why Personal Training is such a huge industry, I mean, surely I can count how many reps I’m up to in my dumbbell squats, and I’m pretty sure I know when my 30 second rest interval is up following a sprint (thanks stopwatch).

And what am I paying you to do anyway?

To remind me to drink more water?

To always stretch after a strength session?

To not down too many Vodkas on Saturday night?

I know all of this. But every year, when Spring begins and I realise how fast Summer is charging towards me, and how badly I want to live on the beach in a Seafolly bikini with the body confidence of Miranda Kerr, I always decide that “I definitely, 100% need a personal trainer” – for the 1000th time.

But why do I feel that I need to splurge hard earned coin on a bystander to watch me burpee my life away?

Oh, just a little birdy I like to call, accountability.

The ‘A’ word is exactly what Australians spend $390m a year on. (Personal Trainers in Australia: IBIS World)

It’s interesting isn’t it, that we seek the need to feel obliged or answerable to an external source, in order to fulfill a task set before us – even if it is for our own benefit. But I guess it’s just the top bloke inside us, who wants to feel as if we have done someone a favour.

I don’t blame you! Think about when you were young, how you would help mum in the garden, or clean your room, and be so eager to tell everyone how you were SUCH an essential contributor to how lovely the roses looked, or how clean the entire house was. The same childlike attitude towards rewards, clearly still resides somewhere inside us.

It all comes back to our desire for gratification, essentially to feel good. We can’t shake centuries of hedonism! I mean you can try, just make sure you ‘shake it like a polaroid picture’, and let me know how you go!

And this provision of gratification in a positive way, is how a few of my pals at Bodytone Training are achieving great successes with every passing day. Let me explain.

The boys at Bodytone, are helping each client to reach their health and fitness goals at frighteningly spectacular speeds. It seems, they have understood the very essence of what Trainers stand for, and leveraged it to it’s maximum. It’s safe to say, that these lads are taking accountability to a WHOLE new level.

Think DAILY contact: routine phone calls, a simple text or even a sneaky snap chat, in which clients are made accountable, answerable, responsible and liable. Every indulgent confession, each smashing of a new personal best, it’s all out there, and after your daily update with the PT you’ll either feel rather guilty, or incredibly amazing for today’s effort.

So the take-away from this week? Get accountable!

Don’t necessarily get a trainer (although if you want one, give Bodytone a bell), hire a personal coach, enlist a Spanish tutor, employ a Yoga instructor and find a nutritionist. Just start enlisting those you already have around you.

Start using your friends and family. Share your goals and ideas, you will be surprised at what others share in return, how their unique perspective enriches your own, and how truly, “two minds are better than one”.

This is most important in terms of goal attainment, we sometimes need someone who is a “3rd party observer with absolutely no personal interest in the matter” (Viola, She’s the Man), to remind us of our progress, improvement and development.

So puh-lease start sharing your goals, talk about them, go crazy, get people involved. They will love it.

I’d love to hear how sharing your goal with others has helped you!

Who’s your daddy, I mean friend?

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There’s an old Assyrian proverb that says, “Tell me who your friends are, and I’ll tell you who you are”.

When I first heard this, the Independent Woman (cue Destiny’s Child) in me, fired up with all sorts of banter, like:

“Ain’t nobody gon’ break my stride”,

“It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to”,

“I do what I want”,

“Its’ my life, and its now or never…”, etc., etc.

But as I pondered this whole notion of “friendly” influence, I realized that yep, I definitely share:

  • The same excessive use of abbreviations…. as my friends
  • The same love/hate relationship with Miley Cyrus…. as my friends
  • The same desire to live on Bondi Beach and have weekly Sunday sessions at the Ivy Pool Club…. as my friends.
  • And of course, the same idea of fun …. as my friends.

But surely the essence of my friend’s Dior fragrance (or is that mine?) has embedded itself a lot deeper than just into my new Kookai tank.

(P.S I know what you’re thinking, how many times can I person say the word ‘friend’ in a blog post – at this point its 8. This simply amplifies my point)

How much of ‘me’ is me, and how much is an amalgamation of the people around me, my friends?

Almost as deep as Barry White, hey.

But seriously, the aforesaid slice of wisdom from Assyria (which I have since learnt, was a pretty major Empire around 2,500 years before Jesus was born), is something we should all think about.

How different are you, to who you were 3 months, a semester, a year ago, as a result of those you surround yourself with?

What character traits, attitudes, beliefs, aspirations and quality of life are you extracting?

In no way am I suggesting that we unfriend everyone we know who doesn’t have Oprah-like generosity or Lance Armstrong-like ambition, that would be ridiculous. (If you have Oprah’s number though, throw it this way!)

I’m simply encouraging you to check out your best friends list, and ensure that it includes at least a few soldiers who will challenge, inspire, motivate and encourage you, just the they way you need to be.

Charlie ‘Tremendous’ Jones said: “You are the same today you’ll be in 5 years except for two things: the people you meet and the books you read”.

My encouragement of everyone to resist the nerdy stigma and get into books will be covered in a later post, so for now, just marinate in the thought that the people around you, are very, very important.

In light of this ‘friend’ theme, I thought it only appropriate to invite the very best of friends to the party. Enjoy.