Bansky-inspired Siesta Time.

Screen Shot 2016-09-19 at 9.21.49 AM.png

Image via Mikutas.

Hi stranger, it’s been a while.

Okay, that’s the understatement of the century. It’s been a long while. Arguably too long since I put pen to paper, thought to word and word to world.

But the good man Banksy consumed, captivated and inspired me once again with a little quote. It was likely directed at someone brilliant, some time ago, somewhere cool, and in it, he said:

‘When you get tired learn to rest, not to quit’.

And god, have I been resting.

I haven’t stopped thinking, or pondering or lamenting on life for one second, I’ve just been too busy looking outside bus windows in admiration of majestic landscapes, and introducing myself with the same “it’s Fiona with an S-H’, in between mouthfuls of Europe’s delicacies, in the best cities of the world. The summer has been an adventure, but it hasn’t given me a chance to drown in a pool of contemplation and come out the other side with a written lil-somethin’ to share.

Sadly, writing hasn’t been a priority, until last night, it was. And the idea came to me from the most unlikely, yet oh-so Spanish source…

La siesta.

I can’t confirm whether it’s me spiraling back into the #studentlyf where nanna naps are a daily necessity, or if I’m truly turning japanese spanish as my intention for exchange would have it – but siestas are becoming a regular thing for me.

Broken down: roughly around the same time everyday, I take myself to my room, close the door, put on a slow playlist and close my eyes – but not to sleep.

In these moments I’m not particularly thinking of anything, but everything all at once.

I’m imagining scenarios, watching plots of reality unfold, rewriting scenes then jumping to another, to meet and play with something else. I’m thinking about goals and aspirations and fears and uncertainties. I wonder why I didn’t buy more goats cheese on my way home and how much water I keep forgetting to drink. I reminisce about the people I met 8 countries ago, and keep getting stuck on that ‘Closer’ song I cant get out of my head (baby pull me closer, blah blah blah something Rover). I also think of what to eat next, what to do tomorrow, tonight and how cold it really gets in Pamplona. Did Hemingway mention it at all?….

A million and five things race through my head, most often to the sound of an acoustic cover, and before I know it, I’m pretty convinced I’ve solved most of the world’s problems.

I may even drift off for a miniscule nap somewhere amongst the madness.

 But what happens, after a week (okay three weeks) of this indulgent behavior, I’ve become dependent on my daily siesta. I’m hungry for silence, thirsty for a clear my mind, excited to think, deeply.

Like untangling a heap of necklaces, finally cleaning the water bottles out of your car, or managing to correctly cook rice on a stove without ruining the pot –  a mental de-clutter is almost euphoric, and probably a pretty vital skill.

 Like the good spring clean mum insists on doing every (damn) time a visitor comes, I’m convinced our minds need the same TLC.

So stop, seriously even if it’s just for 5 minutes* and let your mind run it’s course, empty itself.

My gal Sylvia Plath coined herself a ‘victim of introspection’, but contemplation doesn’t need to be that dark. Think deep, solve the world and your own mysteries. I don’t believe time is wasted by ruminating about something or nothing at all.

sb.

NOTES:

*Of course 10 minutes of down time is better than 5, and 15 minutes even more so, then you can look into mediation and wow, that’s a whole other ball-park. The Headspace App is a good place to start.

In the name of Time.

Screen Shot 2016-03-20 at 9.48.24 pm

Image by VSCO via Pinterest.

Do you believe in coincidences?

I totally do. The five year old Disney-addict in me calls it ‘stars aligning’. Even perfect timing, or ‘meant to be’ style stuff.

I think for majority of us, the whole concept of ‘timing’ is only realized when things don’t happen the way we want them to.

You fail that test, miss out on GA floor tickets to a gig, miss a train, order after there’s no more avo left to adorn your sourdough multi-grain with poached egg and feta… the list goes on.

‘Timing’ is so prevalent here and sometimes it hurts a lot, to not get the things you want, in the dreamy way you want them, and with the immediacy in which you deserve.

There’s an inverse to this though, and on the most recent Saturday night it hit me pretty hard – in the best way. A truly unique, unlikely turn of events led to a beautiful ‘right time, right place’ kinda experience. And I realized that every mini decision I’d made in the lead up to it, had magically resulted in such a delicious outcome.

Fundamentally, it was all in the name of ridiculously, perfect timing.

Getting caught up in our daily grind, it’s so easy to forget the little things that make other moments perfect. From getting on the right carriage on the train to score a seat and read your book, to walking a different street and finding the best new coffee spot, to meeting someone new in the most unlikely of places, to bumping into a friend half way across the world.

The list is eternal, and appreciating those small moments can make even the rainiest day, absolute bliss.

Digging deeper though, it’s clear most things are resultant of an earlier decision.

Good or bad, there’s inevitably a consequence for everything. How bizarre to think and know, that any decision or action you make will have an effect on the future. The butterfly effect. (Side note: great movie if you haven’t seen it yet!)

I’m fascinated by consequences. Yet when I consider that the whole timing thing is actually a thing, the whole ‘everything happens for a reason’ is a pretty wicked mindset to adopt. How good!?

So for once, let’s let go of being such control freaks and let timing do her thang.

How comforting to recognize when the stars align, see when they don’t and know that a clearer night is just a road trip away.

(That was a metaphor – wew!)

*On that note, my friends and I are currently on a road trip binge. Any and all ideas on good spots for ridiculous sunsets and waterfalls would be greatly appreciated. I trust timing of me posting this and you reading it, will provide me with the wicked adventures I need.

After all, it’s about the timing yeah?

sb.

 

 

 

 

Unplanning the plan.

Image via Pinterest.

Image via Pinterest.

I have a plan.

Not that I’ve put a deadline on things, but yeah look, if I haven’t gradated by 2017, someone intervene. And if I haven’t been to Scandinavia before I’m 25, somebody needs to steal me away. I have plans, or maybe they are goals I’m not sure – but I am sure that I want them to happen, and I have a rough outline of a sketched timeline in my head of where everything fits. It’s perfect and I’d show it to you, but it’s in my head.

Maybe it’s another social norm I’m trying to comply by – I think I need to have a plan because that’s what you’re supposed to do, right? Everybody has plans, and it’s duly noted (especially by the Personal Trainer fraternity, you know who you are) ‘if you fail to plan, you plan to fail’. I’ve taken it for this long, but I’m turning the tables – just a little bit anyway. Ready to hear me out?

What about the plans I didn’t know I wanted to plan?

There’s no denying that one of the most cheekiest aspects of life is the tendency for things to just, literally fall into one’s lap. A chance meeting of someone who shares your mutual love for Matcha leading to great chats and endless, future Matcha dates. This person soon becomes a close friend who inspires you to take up Bikram – you didn’t plan for this. What about a sudden realization that studying abroad is an option? In Sweden. You planned on finishing your degree in a flat three years, but you didn’t plan to crave travel, and you weren’t even aware that exchange was even a thing. Good luck fitting that into your concrete, life schedule.

So in that moment, when outside forces start to poke fun at our plans, do we turn a blind eye to everything we didn’t know we didn’t know about (read it again, it makes sense),  simply because it wasn’t featured in the original blueprint? I hope not.

In some respects, I feel like a ‘go with the flow’ mindset is a much more fruitful approach to life opposed to the schoolteacher curriculum, ‘planning’ method. Can we live a little?

Be spontaneous, cheeky, playful and willing to let go of the plan.

Someone great once told me ‘If someone asks you to jump in the car, don’t ask where its going, just jump in’. Now obviously, don’t jump in the car if it’s a white ute and the bearded driver is offering lollies to succumb you to join the ride – in that case call 000.

Be aware, but also be aware that there are possibilities you couldn’t even imagine.

Now believe me, I’m no Avril Lavigne, f*$% the system kind of gal, I’m all for playing the game, but I know that the trick is to know the rules so you can break them effectively. It’s a Dalai Lama tactic (no kidding, look it up), so is completely justified, moral and somewhat enlightened – try it sometime.

Because as Harriet Wakelam, a superstar #girlboss I met recently perfectly explained, ‘if you’d asked me five years ago, if I’d be here today, I’d say no’.

We can never totally predict what is going to happen, how it’s going to evolve or even if we will still care about the things we do now, in the future. Trying to figure out the world and its crazy ways is impossible, so why try. Choose your battles.

Just embrace the unpredictability like a Melbourne day. Pack a raincoat, some sunnies and your bathers. You’ll either be jumping in puddles or splashing in a pool – either way, its going to be a good time.

Unplan the plan. The end.

Love, S.

P.S Inspiration for this piece came at 7.45am when I was offered a dream internship at one of my favourite brands. I’m trying really hard to take my own advice, deny my previous ‘plans’ for where I thought I was going, and start chasing something I didn’t think of yet. Writing is my way of coping with WHAT TO DO! #halp

The un-rave: Lessons I learnt from the ‘night-in’.

Image via We Heart It.

Image via We Heart It.

It happens to the best of us, whether it be a raging plan that never works out, a tribe of friends that have all conveniently decided to hermit-ize for the weekend, or an overworking job that leaves you feeling tired enough to willingly ‘bench’ this one out; it’s a sad truth, but ‘nights-in’ are an unavoidable reality.

For me, the symptoms of a ‘night-in’ are always the same: I pre-empt the night with a Nanna, rather than a Disco nap (the prefix succinctly defining post-nap activities, #nannalyf vs #discolyf). And this said Nanna nap, turns into a full-blown hibernation lasting almost 3 hours – it was supposed to be a NAP, c’mon Sheesh!

What this terribly timed slumber does for me is two things, two counterintuitive glorious things: It 1) rids me of being tired, and 2) Rids me of being tired just in time for it to be too late to make actual plans.

It’s in that moment of harsh realization that I really begin to ponder life.

I mean, a perfect, summer Friday ‘night-in’, is the perfect antidote for some deep and pensive thinking.

Everyone, well at least everyone except Mum and Dad are out, eating Huxtaburgers, drinking mojitos, mingling, dancing, making memories and loving it. Me? I’m scrolling through the TV programme praying for a roaring movie to be on and checking Facebook every 5 minutes to make sure I’m not missing out on anything too fantastic – I love when people don’t check in, I also love a lack of Instagram posts and no new Snapchat stories, STAY OFF THE PHONE PEOPLE, you are doing wonders for my ego.

After about half an hour of this self-mutilating surveillance of the world that exists everywhere but here, something changes. I’m totally lacking energy, totally detached from the fact that yeah, whilst it’s a ‘night-in’, it could be a great ‘night-in’ at that.

So I take it upon my self to reignite that TGIF splendor, even if it means I remain in my pyjamas for the entirety of it, because there is something about riding a Friday night solo, that is actually quite insightful. Here are the lessons I learnt from the nights I spent in.

Weekend-feel basics.

Sure they may not be heading out for a rager, but parents know how to tune those weekend feels even in the slightest way. While it’s not the most bikini-bod-friendly option, take-away of all sorts does wonders for the soul. No dishes, no meal prep, no worries. It’s the weekend, and that means chill time for all (except the Pizza Man, we need you!).

Windows are open, music is playing and the beers are on the house (literally). You don’t ever need to go too far to feel the weekend vibes.

I really needed this.

Weekdays are often so hectic we don’t notice the little things that need our attention, like:

How long was my room actually going to stay messy for?

That parking fine was almost over-due!

Wow, I totally forgot I left that rotting banana in my bag!

So my sister DID steal my skirt, AND leave it scrunched up on the floor, AND it has a stain on it. Note to self: Must. Kill. Her.

It’s quite bizarre the things you find, realize and do when you have the time to find, realize and do them.

You actually don’t mind Ben Stiller as an Actor.

But I guess, there’s something about ‘There’s something about Mary’ that can turn anyone’s frown upside down. I mean it COULD be worse, you COULD be Ted when he gets ‘stuck’ in the zipper. Poor guy.

When did staying in stop being cool anyway?

Slumber parties were literally the cause of my existence – until they weren’t. Remember the days when your sleeping bag was your best friend and pancakes were a Saturday essential?

Coloured popcorn and movie marathons with friends used to equal the BEST. NIGHT. EVER. I’m not sure when, how or why we decided that wearing short skirts in winter was a better idea than being cocooned in an arctic slumber bag that still smells like grade 6 camp #amirite.

I could do this again next Friday.

It’s the end of the week, FRIYAY! And after 5+ full days of waking up early and being a citizen who contributes to the world, it’s time for some ‘me-time’.

It’s an important trait to have: being okay with being alone. And it can totally be a hoot! Once you get passed the first half hour of wallowing in sadness, reaching for the block of chocolate you know you don’t want (but you’re not going out anyway, so you don’t need to wear a tight skirt, so it’s okay right?) you start reaching instead, for something nourishing, something good, and begin to find that it so easy to feel amazing and great and cool – without the additional extras of a dimly lit dance-floor, a good DJ, a group of friends, and pending bar tab.

Because for tonight, it’s just You + You.

You know You so well, You know what You love, what You feel like, what movie You want to watch, and which book You want to read – as well as everything else there is to know. Cultivate this relationship like you do with your best friend.

Because if there is one person you can truly rely on, someone who will follow you to every corner of the earth and never, ever leave you alone on any Fiday night. It’s you.

Here’s to the night-in!

Love, S.

 

 

 

 

#lemonlyf

Image via We Heart It.

Image via We Heart It.

‘When life throws lemons at you, make lemonade’ that old chestnut hey?

But who ever signed up for lemonade making? I mean, unless you’re an old-school Grandma who has a better recipe for lemonade than Schweppes, I think you should leave bubble-making to the experts.

But I guess that’s it isn’t it. You may not have signed up for lemonade making, or ‘that’ outcome, ‘that’ answer, ‘that’ response, or ‘that’ moment – it just happened. And here you are, with two bags full of lemons and a lack of thirst. Now what?

Unfortunately, nobody ever makes a plan for things to go badly, and I suppose that’s the magic of life. We never truly know what is up, down, or due to happen in any given second.

All we can be sure of, is this lemonade philosophy: that given even the sourest ingredient imaginable, something good, refreshing and sweet CAN emerge.

At the very least, plan for that and find a recipe for making a comeback, if Mariah Carey can do it, so can you!

Love, S.

 

Life: So wrong it’s right.

Image by @tezzab via We Heart It.

Image by @tezzab via We Heart It.

Like Killer Pythons and The Lion King, it seems that a broken arm, leg, finger or something, is an essential part of growing up.

Even I, the girl whose idea of a ‘daredevilish’ time is a round on the Ferris Wheel, have endured the torment of broken a bone – admittedly I was one year of age, and it wasn’t my fault.

But Mum has sweetly kept the miniature cast of my thunder thing toddler leg, proving that I’m a fully fledged survivor and the truth that falling down and getting hurt is part of life.

We stumble, often really hard, so hard that the pain is not just a temporary scratch able to be remedied by a cool Wiggles band-aid, but one whose ache lingers for at least 6 weeks, and leaves a great looking scar forever.

But I recently learned something interesting about this: a bone that is broken will heal to be stronger than it was before.

So it seems Yeezy was onto something when he said “Na-na-na that that don’t kill me, can only make me stronger”. Interesting.

It seems that no matter how much Milo smothered milk you drink and how much spinach you eat to keep your bones ‘strong and healthy’, the best thing you can do is to break them, and force their strengthening the hard way – obviously more painful but hey, if it gets the job done right?

Now I’m not suggesting you start attempting backflips and trapeze swinging as a method of toughening up – if you do, at least get a go pro and share the footage around – but I am asking that you see the value in being broken.

I know at the time, a broken bone, crushed heart, shattered dream and battered ego is a brutal sentence, but trust in Mr. Kanye West and rest easy in the knowledge that such tremors “makes us harder, better, faster, stronger”.

We learn far more from our mistakes than our successes, and a huge part of living in this day and age, is our responsibility to abuse the opportunities we are given. No doubt you’ll fall, oh honey, you’re going to crash and burn.

Your world will fall apart, and fall apart again. You’ll stop having fun with your ‘best friend’ and be forced to find a new one, you will stop enjoying your job, mangoes will go out of season and your favourite show will release its finale. Your dream job won’t want you, neither will Ryan Gosling, and you are going to make wrong decisions again and again.

It’s all part of it, and that’s okay. Just know that there is value in getting it wrong, and most of the time it’s so wrong it’s right.

So jump higher than you think you can, and don’t be too afraid of coming back down, because:

Work it harder.

Make it better.

Do it faster.

Makes us stronger.

More than ever.

Love, S.

 

The Presence Present.

Image by @sjanaelise via Instagram.

Image by @sjanaelise via Instagram.

It’s like, you know when you’ve set yourself up for a ‘Nanna Nap’, not any old nap, but a strictly-18-minutes-only-snooze. You set your alarm for the precise amount of time, and as you slowly allow yourself to drift into a heavenly slumber, you start thinking about everything you have to do as soon as the alarm goes off.

You start to panic wondering if you should just pack it in and ditch the nap altogether, but no, “I deserve and NEED this nap” you tell yourself. But before you commit, you look back at the clock once more, “Alrighty,15 minutes to go, I’ve got this!”

And then the little devil inside chirps up again:

“Hmm is it snack time yet?”

“Surely it’s snack time, hmm, I’m hungry.”

“What will I have for a snack?”

“I think we still have some Pad Thai left, tat will be yum.”

“Lol what am I thinking, I’m trying to be healthy. I saw some bananas, definitely a smoothie.”

“Smoothies, yum! Good idea Shee! I wonder what else I could put in this magical smoothie.”

“Ugh STOP thinking about your damn smoothie, NAP! You have like only 14 minutes left now.”

“Ok so let’s get this straight, as soon as the alarm goes off, I’m going to sort out this, call her, text him about that, clean this, wash that, the list goes on to the tune of “My head is a Jungle”.

“Ok, one last look at my phone for the time before I 100% promise to nap.”

“2 minutes left, What? Seriously? Noooo!!”

The above example is 100% accurate in my world, and following the whole one-sided dialogue, I am always malnourished of the miniscule 18 minute doze I so desperately needed, I often opt instead for a huge cup of coffee, with a side of guilt for

  1. Spending almost a quarter of an hour thinking about a damn smoothie I now don’t even want.
  2. Spending 18 minutes being completely useless, and most of all,
  3. Not having the nap I promised myself.

So I bargained a simple nap, a slice of solitude and relaxation for just a moment, but instead, I polluted every last second of it.

And looking back, I’m a classic for polluting the good by not being totally there, for being less than present and not completely embracing whatever ‘it’ is.

It’s the ultimate sabotage, the purest form of self-betrayal and one, which is way too common today. In an effort to reduce this epidemic, i’ve come up with some simple solutions to some of life’s most pressing issues, hear me out:

You want an ice cream? Then go bloody get it, and grab a double scoop in a waffle cone while you’re at it. And annoy the ice-cream girl with asking for at least 5 samples. This is your time to shine, don’t hold back!

You want to go to the beach? I don’t care that you are in a mode of self-imprisonment due to a forthcoming exam tomorrow – tomorrow is going to come whether you got to the beach or not, so why not just go.

You want to move out? Do it! Sure Mum will be sad, but she’ll still be able to show you love in the form of sending 2000  “are you alive” texts a day. Plus you’ll be home every Tuesday for Spaghetti anyway.

Moral of the story: do what you want – only if you do it with a twist: BE THERE.

Actually show up mentally, physically and emotionally. 

Embrace your salted caramel gelato with every delicate lick, squeeze the sand between your toes with extra vigor and splash around in the ocean because you can. But most importantly, do not be afraid of making the decisions that seemed so huge and adulterated when you were young – because you are older now, and it is time.

So in the words of my favourite Real Housewife, Jackie Gillies:

Shine Shine Shine!

Love, S.

Nailing the Fail.

Buzz Kill by Arrow Divine via Instagram. Shot by Cloudy Rhodes.

Buzz Kill by Arrow Divine via Instagram.
Shot by Cloudy Rhodes.

There’s a lot of noise surrounding this whole ‘Just Do It’, ‘Never Give Up’ mentality, and I’m about to put my foot down.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the Nike ‘tick’ as much as the next person, but I’m thinking that there’s something quite profound in failure, or as I like to call it, ‘strategic quitting’.

Sounds like an oxymoron and a half I know, but considering the lack of hours in a day, days in a week, weeks in a year and years in a lifetime, I’m going to be a selective snob, and say that quitting and ‘failing’ is kind of really great!

Personally, I couldn’t even tell you how many times I’ve stopped reading a new book after just not ‘feeling it’ within the first 5 pages, how many restaurants my friends and I have ditched after being ‘not totally in love’ with the menu options, or how many movies I’ve only watched 20 minutes of.

Am I Picky? Yes.

A possessor of obscenely high expections? Definitely.

A changeling? Most likely.

But I’m going to own these nuances, and pretend that I’m onto something, something good.

Because, in the past week, a lot of events are really leading me to believe that we only make plans to change them, and that we seek to follow rules only to be a badass and break them anyway.

Unfortunately, the ‘choice’ to discontinue a fad diet, long-term relationship or ‘dream’ career is often labeled as failure with a capital ‘F’, but in my opinion, life is way too short for bad vibes, and if being a failure is what it comes down to, I’ll claim that badge proudly.

Because there HAS to be some profound beauty in walking away – in making new tracks, singing new songs and completely turning your back on something that just doesn’t fit anymore.

I mean, why bother wasting your time drinking bad coffee, finishing an ugly seagull puzzle, or pouring energy into a relationship that doesn’t make you laugh until your cheeks hurt?

So throw the coffee down the sink and make a new one with cinnamon on top and extra sugar, throw away that puzzle and stop making an effort with those who don’t appreciate it.

Don’t feel sorry for yourself, embrace and be the change. There’s no excuse but you don’t need one.

It’s called failing to win.

Love, S.

Happy Little Vegemites: Secrets of the Grin.

Happy.

Happy.

There’s nothing like some down time to make you contemplate the things you really love, and on a recent bus ride from Ollantaytambo to Cusco, Peru – which was just that little bit too long – I had just that sort of ‘me’ time.

Prepared for a three-hour journey through the Peruvian countryside, I prayed to my iPod to prepare the best, chilled playlist, turned up my earphones, lifted my legs onto the back of the seat in front of me (smelly feet alert!), and spaced out to the view from my window seat.

There’s something special about some old school tunes that really make me smile from the eardrums out, and as I bumped along to the beat – and potholes – I started thinking about the other, teeny tiny little details, which really make me happy.

I’m not talking big-ticket items like “winning the lottery”, “falling in love” or “landing a dream job”, because these are pretty far and few between. If I thought these big things were the only way to be a happy-go-lucky person, then happiness would always seem another Power Ball ticket, lover and promotion away.

So why not focus on the little things.

It sounds cliché I know, but think about these merry makers. Think of how simple yet totally rewarding they are (hopefully you can relate):

  • When Coconut water is on sale for no particular reason.
  • When a waiter brings a big, cold, jug of water to your table without being asked.
  • Big coffee mugs.
  • Hearing children speak in another language.
  • Perfectly made cordial.
  • Waking up to a sunny day.
  • Sand between your toes.
  • Smelling good.
  • Fresh bed sheets.
  • Hotel bathrobes.
  • Hot showers.
  • Telling a bad joke that gets laughs anyway.
  • Perfectly ripened avocadoes.
  • Finishing a book.

These are just a few of my favorite things, and with them, I am the happiest little vegemite in the world.

Sure, the big things are important too, but at least I can experience the bliss from any of the above daily, of my own accord, without relying on some outside source to bestow upon me a $2m prize pool, attention, or a new job.

So what little things ‘float your boat’?

Find a pretty place to sit, grab a pen and paper, and brainstorm the heck out of everything that reveals the cute dimples in your cheeks!

Conjure, remember, reminisce and revive every thing you love, every incy-wincy-teeny-weeny detail, use them and abuse them everyday.

I’d love to hear what you come up with!

Love S.

Life Lessons from Biggie Smalls.

Notorious B.I.G.

Notorious B.I.G.

Minimalism. I could start and end this entire post with that one word. Now I know exam-time is the usual antithesis for uncovering many of life’s mysteries, I mean, let’s not be ashamed of mastering choux pastry all in the name of procrasti-baking. But honestly, on my hunt to find ways of distracting myself from memorising all of Spanish’s three past tenses, I am learning a whole lot more than the difference between singular and plural conjugations.

I am realising how badly I want to uncomplicate my life.

Call it a cull, call it a quarter life crisis, call it me being totally warped and mildly insane, or take it from me, and call it nothing but a change.

I can’t blame these epiphanies merely on pending exams, because I think a lot of my musing is borne from the fast approaching departure date of my latest, trip of a lifetime. It seems that in every lead up to this type of adventure, I really begin to question well, everything.

What am I going to learn?

Who am I going to meet?

What am I going to see?

Where am I going to be?

How am I going to feel?

What song will be the soundtrack to this journey?

Will I change? Will I be different?

Will home be different when I get back?

Do I even want anything to be different?

Am I even ready to do this, to bail all over again on comfort in order for something so totally foreign that I can’t really even pronounce it with my lips let alone my feelings?

I soon get pretty caught up in all these questions, trying to answer them with yet another three issues, which have become illuminated by the initial query.

But as I try to take it slow, attempt to calm myself and focus on the present – because that’s all we really have, I realize that again, I have supremely complicated everything.

And so this minimalist thing pops up once more. It could be a phase, or it could be a turning point: a pre-emptive change into the person I will be when I begin to legitimately grow-up. I’m not sure who she is, what she looks like, or if she will have ultimately experienced that growth spurt I am currently still waiting on, but right now, I know she wants simplicity.

As I look back now on the past 6 months  – which from my mum’s standards has seen me be ‘way too busy’ for my own good, and from my grandmother’s perspective, has inspired her to tell me to ‘slow down and take care of myself’ each time we converse over green teas – it seems that their wishes for me to tone it down a notch have officially rubbed off.

So beloved matriarchs, here it is. I’m toning it down.

I won’t take on 5 projects at once all because the opportunities exist, and I won’t say yes to being in three places at once simply because I drive a fast Jag with iPod connectivity to get me through the distance. I won’t sleep only 5 hours a night because there’s too much to do, and I won’t need to use an excel spreadsheet to organize my professional and social life. What I will do however is follow my heart over my head. If it excites, scares, intimidates and challenges me then YES! But I’m over wasting my time.

So in the name of Europe, South America and whichever other continent I decide to ambush in the next year, I’m ready to step up.

I am ready to focus, to work smarter not harder, to laugh louder, and smile wider than ever before. But there’s a catch. A little sentence that will lead me through it all, one offered by none other than Biggie himself:

“Stay far from timid. Only make moves when your heart’s in it and live the phrase: the sky’s the limit.”

If your heart is in ‘it’, it’s worth mentioning, and if it’s worth mentioning, capturing and writing down it’s important. Because honestly, what is important, is very important.

So bay-bee, what’s important to you? I’d love to know what gives you excited shivers. Get in touch!

Sheona xo.

[contact-form] .